"whenever I fantasize about nothingness, reason always pulls me back to reality, and I can no longer find an excuse to continue."
the letter story the night before last was "B". At the end of the article, a thorn marked "Bin is B". So when I woke up this morning and looked at my phone, I saw that Zhang Jingzhi sent me a screenshot last night, which was a message from the reader, "so the third letter story, C, is Tong c?"
rubbed his eyes, thought about how he felt recently, put the big doll in his arms aside and typed back to him on the keyboard: "reply to my message and tell him I'll write the story of the third letter myself."
these days I saw a movie from seven years ago. In fact, I have heard this film a long time ago, and I have used screenshots of tweets before, but I have never dared to watch this movie. It's called "he doesn't like you that much." every part of the film shows a theme, "if a man doesn't seem to care about you, he must not care about you." If a man doesn't come to you on his own initiative, he must not have thought of looking for you.
I dare not see it because I have always believed, or have been taking a fluke, to deceive myself, thinking that I will be an exception and that a boy will not take the initiative. Why can't it be because he is introverted, accustomed to silence, and affectionate?
A Shi often came to see me some time ago. She said that she liked a boy in the same department and was a very introverted boy. As to how introverted he is, he hesitates and hesitates when others talk to him; he must be the slowest one to raise his hand in a collective vote; and he never takes the initiative to help others familiarize himself with the work when a new person joins the department.
"then how can you like him? you are obviously not the same as him."
"he was very kind to me in details, for example, a group of us went to the movies and everyone went to buy Coke. He specially bought a cold bottle at room temperature, and then asked me which bottle to drink; for example, after the department meeting, he would always wait for me to go back to the dormitory; and he would always go around to the other side of the traffic when crossing the street. These behaviors make me feel that he cares about me very much, so I like him is also a very natural thing. You often write about love, so do you think we have a chance? "
looking at Ashi's face full of peach blossoms, I only asked her, "does he often talk to you?" Ah Shi said, "No, but I don't think it's much of a problem. Maybe he's just shy and doesn't know how to express his feelings. You see he's usually so kind to me." I asked her again, "did he ask you out?"
Ashi, who was sitting opposite me drinking lemon tea, was silent. She bit the straw and looked up at me. "No, but are these two important questions?"
I said "hmmm" in a very low voice. I know this answer is cruel to A Shi in the ambiguous period, but I know that this answer is the only standard answer. It is as definite as a single topic. It can only be this.
Ashi is like the girl in the movie who can't wait for a phone call: "maybe he accidentally lost my number?" Maybe he called me and didn't answer? Maybe he was in a car accident? "
she believes that she is an exception, an exception to the situation that "boys take the initiative to find you is to like you", so in the face of her uncertain feelings, she tries to find reasons to support herself to continue to lie to herself.
looking at A Shi, who sits opposite with a peach blossom and a sad face, I think love is really terrible. Obviously, she is such a smart person who has participated in the Mathematical Olympiad and won the top three, but when she enumerates so many reasons why "boys don't take the initiative". Forget to write down the correct answer-"because he doesn't want to contact you".
I have always thought that liking someone is an impossible thing to hide.
even if you ostensibly maintain a relationship with his ordinary classmate, you will go through his circle of friends over and over again before you go to bed; even if you don't say a word with him, you will still set a dynamic that only he can see. Say what you want to say to him. Even if you are writing with your head down, you can't help looking at him when you stand up.
similarly, if a person likes you, he can't hide from you. Love is very direct, like this one, it is impossible to like the other, think of a person will go to him. On the other hand, if he doesn't find you, it means he doesn't like you, just as straightforward and unambiguous.
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Last night I sent a message to Ashi: "when you doubt whether you like someone, you like it; when you doubt whether that person likes you, you don't like it." Love is certain, and you are no exception. You haven't even won another bottle on the yogurt lid. Where do you have the courage to believe that you have met true love? "
Yes, he may be nice to you, but who says that opening the car door to help you order food to your taste and buying you medicine when you are sick can't come from a gentleman and good manners? Yes, he may be silent, he may be busy, but a man will never say "busy" about what he wants.
I want to say to Ashi that there are no rules in love. Please trust your feelings. When you doubt it, it must not be.
because people who like you won't make you suspicious at all.
I went shopping with my friends during the Mid-Autumn Festival. When I passed a store, I pointed to the blue logo and told him, "you know, the boys I used to like like to wear this brand of clothes very much. Later, for a long time, I was afraid to see this brand."
turned his head aside, looked away, smiled and said, "from then on, I didn't want to like anyone anymore."
I used to feel like the hero in the movie. Because I don't believe in love, I never really treat the people around me. I still think that there are many invincible "tricks" and try my best tricks. But at the end of the film, the girl and the man who finally became his girlfriendSuch a sentence made me think for a long time:
"you are not winning, you are alone." Maybe I did a lot of stupid things, but I know that I will find the right person faster than you. "
at that moment, I felt as if I had been taken off my mask and found myself being smart. I thought that to hide my love for others was to protect myself. But in fact, it is just an emergency measure of excessive fear.
so, if you like it, don't hide it. I hope that one day at the end of an article, I will firmly write a sentence to the right person:
"I don't believe in love, but I believe in you."